http://marshill.com/media/real-marriage/reverse-engineering-your-life-and-marriage
Bottom line: This is the last sermon of the "Real Marriage" series by Pastor Mark Driscoll. In a half sermon, half Q&A manner, Driscoll leads a discussion on how married couples can live practically according to Biblical teachings. Below, I include bullet points from Driscoll's sermon. My notes do not include the Q&A session, but the session contains wonderful personal experiences shared by Godly couples and is worth a listen.
THE LAST DAY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY
What does "reverse-engineering" mean? It means to look at the results and figure out how to get there.
Driscoll proposes, "The most important day of your life and your marriage is the last day."
The idea is, if we know, as a couple, how we want our lives to end, we would know where we are headed. And when we know where our final destination is, it is easier for us to figure out what we have to do to get there.
As Christians moving forward, here are some principals to bear in mind:
1. We need Jesus
Our relationship with Jesus is always our most important relationship. I cannot stress this more. Things always start to fall apart when we stop putting Jesus smack center in our lives. Our values shift toward selfishness when we stop looking to Jesus. Because from Jesus, our sins are forgiven; we begin to change through the guidance of the Holy Spirit; we learn how to love ourselves; we learn how to love others; and when we fall rock bottom, Jesus perseveres with us through our troubles.
2. We need Jesus' people
Proverbs 15:22
“Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.”
We all have bad days, and it's during such times that we need outside support more than ever. We are influenced by those around us--How we deal with pain, what we value, etc. If we want to be more like Jesus, then we should surround ourselves with Jesus' people.
3. We need prayer and planning
Proverbs 16:3
“Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.”
With Jesus at the center of our lives, we need to be open communicators; not just with our partners but with God as well.
With Jesus at the center of our lives, we need to be open communicators; not just with our partners but with God as well.
Driscoll says, "Prayer is talking to God the Father, through God the Son, by the power of God the Holy Spirit, and it is also listening to God, and prayer is the rhythm of conversation with God."
We are not alone in this world, and we were not placed in this world to walk through our lives alone. God is always with us. When we talk to Him, when we listen to Him, we are guided by His wisdom, as opposed to being misguided by our own foolishness.
Jesus taught us to live by God's will and not our own. Keeping an open conversation with God is one of the best ways to ensure that.
4. We need flexibility and a sense of urgency
Proverbs 16:9
“The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.”
We may have a great plan for our life and future, but we simply do not know when we would leave this world.
Driscoll stresses, "What is revealed in those moments, truly, is a relationship with Jesus. Do we believe that he will be enough, if our spouse is gone? Do we believe that he is still good, even when things are hard? Do we trust that he will, in every way, get us through whatever season we find ourselves in? Not that it’ll be easy or pain free, but that it will be for Jesus’ glory and our good."
We don't know if we have another minute, another day, another week, another month, another year, or another decade. Do not put off the important things (trust in the Lord, loving each other, etc.), because we simply do not know where we would be next. To live as if today is our last day, to live it to the glory of God, we would live God-guided lives, viewing amazing miracles as God works in our lives. And when it comes time for us to leave, with or without warning, we leave with peace because we know where God's taking us. Those we leave behind would also be at peace because they would know where God's taking us. This is why we start with having Jesus at the center of our lives, because we want to end holding on to Jesus' hand.
For some more practical advice, checkout the Q&A sessions.
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